My Love For Music

Hey there! I hope y’all are doing great. Ok let just get straight into the topic. I so wanted to write something related to this from very long time now but whatever! I am doing it now. We are having lockdown due to Covid-19’s second wave which is getting serious day by day, we don’t know when it’s going to end and I have nothing to do apart from eating, scrolling social medias, occasional exercises, watching YouTube, listening to music, sleeping and repeating. So this morning when I was doing my household chores of cleaning, cooking etc. with my YouTube playing in the background while working, a song played after such a long time. It was “Timi bina ko Jivan” by Narendra Pyasi. That song created an atmosphere of nostalgia taking me all the way back to my childhood and it amused my mood instantly.

Before going to the context of that song, I want to share about how it all started i.e. my love for music as the title suggests. When I was small may be 5–6 years old, we had a cassette player where we can put sound tape and my grandfather had lots of tapes of Bhajan of Pundit Narayan Prasad Pokharel who was a Baachan Shiromani.. He used to recite Bhagwat Mahapuraan at different parts of the country. I was his bhajan’s fan. I used to go to his Mahapuraan Event when he used to come in chitwan and near my home. I never used to miss if I got chance to go. I used to listen them bhajan on cassette player everyday, sing and dance on them. Everybody at my home were fond of me singing and dancing on bhajan and I was good at it. That’s how I started loving music and dance. It was not just limited within the four walls of my home. When I was growing up Kalika FM was popular Radio Station of Chitwan and they used to run kid program every week. I exactly forgot the name of the program but I guess it was “Baal Manch”. Kids studying in school can participate and showcase their talents verbally i.e. singing, reciting short poems, short stories of their own, cracking jokes. My elders wanted me to take part on it. I remember I was in Class 1 during that time. We didn’t have telephone set at our home so we had to go to my dad’s uncle’s house and it was after school time. I have a very clear memory of this particular incident. It was a big room and there were so many people, my parents, grandparents, my brother and so on. They ranged the phone and trained me earlier on how to talk to the RJ of the radio station hence it was not difficult for me. In fact, the people over the phone from station side were so polite which got me really confident. So the program started, my call got accepted, two sweet people were talking to me over another side of the telephone asking me about my school, my family members, my friends, my hobbies and their voices were really melodiously soothing. They were very kind and they asked me to show my talent. My relatives; some were in the same room as me, other were in different room with the Radio on; listening me. I sang one of the song specifically bhajan of Narayan Pokharel and it was my first time participating, singing on any program. The Presenters of that program thanked me for singing such a nice bhajan and we hung up after few minutes. My family members were happy with my performance and at last I won that program and got the Very same Konka Camera that I put above at the beginning of this blog. It was during 2061 BS and I was so happy to get a camera as a gift although during that time digital cameras were slowly evolving and replacing these kind of roll cameras. So this is how I started to love music, enjoying singing because winning that radio program increased my confident that I have this hobby. I actually won the same camera twice from the same program after 1–2 years later maybe but never really used them. Still these are precious to me.

After that I started singing in my class at my first school where I studied until end of the Class 1 and then moved to the new school. I used to sing songs of Sindhu Malla like “Jhaljhali Aakha Ma” and many more. I used to sing songs of Aani Chhoying Dolma. “Phool ko aakha ma Phoolai Sansar” was my ultimate favourite song that time. During school days, teachers used to have good fridays programs, 5 minutes recreational stuffs before the end of particular class if certain teachers finished the scheduled tentative courses for that day. I always used to sing songs and mostly “phool ko aakha ma” haha. I might have irritated few of my friends and teachers with my obsession for the same song but who cares? I have always loved singing. My family were also very supportive of me. My mom is the teacher of the same school where I Studied so she used to tell other teachers to encourage me to take part in school programs and not just sing in class. Once when I was in class 4, she told one of the teacher to give my name on singing selection during that year’s Tihar Program. I was scared and I went on the Audition. Sadly, I wasn’t selected to which I got disappointed and angry with my mom that she put my name for audition without asking me. Because of that incident I never really wanted to take part in any of the school programs which was wrong but young me was so stupid haha. Since then I only limited my singing session in class programs.

So now finally coming back to the song I heard on YouTube this morning, which is also related to Kalika FM and my participation in one of their programs. I grew a little older hence “Baal Manch” wasn’t my thing anymore. Now finally we have a telephone set in our home. There was this program where people used to call and they have to sing a song live on the song track played by the Radio Station i.e. if I wanted to sing any song( but that should be nepali song only), I have to tell the technical supporter before telling program presenter so that he can search for the track that the participants wanted to sing. In this particular program, there was no any age restrictions i.e. any age group can take part. Mostly adults used to call and sing whereas there used to be few children. That day, I was the first caller and Let me tell you it was one heck of a competition to get your calls ring over the station before even participating in a actual thing. I kinda miss those races these days haha. So I was the first caller and I sang the same song i.e. “Timi Bina ko Jivan” and then after me there were many adults where only I was the kid probably be studying in 6 or 7 class I don’t remember that exactly. Okay, I don’t consider myself really good singer haha but might be that day I happened to be the most melodious one among whoever called and participated. I won that day among all the participants and guess what was the reward or prize of that singing program? It was going to the Office of Kalika FM after a week for that same program and singing any song on live on a radio program that too on track and full song alongside the RJ. That was a dream for me. I was so excited to go there, sing live on a radio program and have an experience of that. I was so excited. My brother and me, we always used to call and participate in various radio programs. In some they used to give rewards and in some they don’t used to give anything but we used to call despite of whatever results they announce. But this particular program and reward was my dream reward and I have finally won it. But unfortunately, my father couldn’t take me to Bharatpur that day because of some personal stuffs and I was sad. My dream of singing live on a radio program was not fulfilled. I never really called again I guess because during that time my father was really busy on his works so I knew it won’t be possible for us to go no matter how many time I call and participate. Remembering all those things right now, how I wished that if my father was free that time I could go and sing and have some kind of experience. I would have gained some experience of singing in public and mass. I have never really sung in public i.e. in large masses and never sung on track. It had been limited within closed doors, classrooms, recordings and now on instagram stories. But I have always wanted to sing on stages and masses no matter how I might sound. I had many opportunities but I never really grabbed it. Sometimes I did in fewer masses and that didn’t turn out that nice and I stepped myself out. Sometimes people were not supportive and used to be mean and I know I shouldn’t have listened to them but I did and I am stupid for that. Honestly, if anybody gives me that opportunity at present too, my insecurities and fear won’t let me do that. Anyways, I do hope someday I do get a chance to sing for just one time to just have that one experience of singing on a stage and on the track obviously so that I don’t have to regret like right now I am regretting for not going to Kalika FM to sing a song and not grabbing any opportunities till now even though I have this soft corner for music and singing.

So yeah, this is it for today. Might not be that extra-ordinary kind of a writing and not so special topic but I wanted to write this story of mine for such a long time and today I did. Just like my Blogsite’s theme i.e. ‘Scribing With Love’, this is a little piece of my life, my childhood, my experience on certain things I adore and love the most that I tried to pen down. I hope many can relate to this who loves singing as well as have the same love for music as me and I hope others will love it too. Thanks for reading it all through till last. I do love to have feedbacks be it good or bad. Feel free to reach out to me wherever its Feasible for you. Thank you :)

Lastly, Time right now is really disappointing and serious. I hope you all stay safe and do the things that you love, that makes you happy no matter what others has to say with hate. Take care everyone!

PS this story was initially posted at my blogger site on May 11, 2021.

Link : https://sumuuscribes.blogspot.com/2021/05/my-love-for-music.html